柯林斯說：嗨，寶貝，晚上好，我親愛的海倫，你在幹嘛。我可以今天在這裏和你說話嗎？
Collins said, "Hi, Baby. Good evening, my dear Helen. What are you doing ?".Can I talk to you here today?
海倫說：我今天去縣城修手機了，不然我沒辦法工作，也沒辦法跟你說話，我平時兩個手機工作，但是信息量太大了，手機內存有點小，丟了覺得有點可惜，我修理一下應該還可以用一段時間，所以就去了縣城一趟，順便看看我弟弟和他的小女朋友，我也想他們了，順便我看看有沒有我喜歡的手機，買一部新的用，這樣我文案策劃和資料就不會丟失了。
Helen said: I went to the county today to repair the cell phone, Otherwise I have no way to work, Also have no way to talk to you, I usually two cell phone work, But the amount of information is too big, Cell phone memory is a little small, Lost feel a little pity, I repair it should also can use for a while, So I went to the county trip, By the way to see my brother and his little girlfriend, I also want them, By the way, I will see if there is a cell phone I like and buy a new one, so that my copywriting plan and information will not be lost.
柯林斯說：你還有弟弟，他在縣城做什麼的，我感覺你和弟弟感情很好的。
Collins said: "You have a brother, he is doing something in the county, I feel that you and your brother's feelings are very good."
海倫說：我有兩個弟弟，我們姐弟之間感情特別好，我現在能夠很好的活著，就是當年弟弟在我抑郁自殺那段時間很好的陪著我，照顧我，我用的網名也是他給我的，他是很棒的男孩子，我一直覺得我有這樣的弟弟，我感覺很驕傲的，我弟弟字寫的很漂亮，我很喜歡，他是個努力上進的好孩子，並且做飯好吃，他每次給我做吃的，我都很喜歡的，總之我有個弟弟，他讓我覺得生命很溫暖，所以我生了兩個孩子，我希望她們姐妹長大以後也可以和她的媽媽和舅舅一樣，感情很好，人生危難時刻可以相互幫助，這樣哪怕人生有無法避免的風險和困難，但是親情的力量總是很偉大的。並且在困境中覺得生命存在著溫暖和希望，這也是親人之間愛的意義所在，雖然生孩子對我這種對身體痛苦承受能力很弱的人來說確實很痛苦，但是我還是選擇生了二胎，兩個丫頭可以一起相伴成長。
Helen said: I have two younger brothers. The relationship between our siblings and brothers is very good. I can live very well now, that is, when my younger brother was very good with me and took care of me when I was suicidal in depression. The name was given to me by him. He is a great boy. I always think I have such a younger brother. I feel very proud. My younger brother writes beautifully. I like it very much. He is a good kid who works hard. And the cooking is delicious, every time he cooks for me,
I like it very much. In short, I have a younger brother who makes me feel that life is very warm, so I have two children. I hope their sisters can grow up to be like her mother and uncle, with a good relationship and life. You can help each other in times of crisis, so that even if there are unavoidable risks and difficulties in life, the power of family affection is always great. And in a difficult situation, I feel that there is warmth and hope in life, which is also the meaning of love between relatives.
Although having a child is really painful for someone like me who is very weak to bear physical pain, I still choose to have a second child, and the two girls can grow up together.
我今天找他的時候，他過來接我和孩子，他平時閑了在家裏練習他喜歡的毛筆字，我想念他給我做的飯菜，以前我們兩個人一起讀書住一起的時候，他經常給我做飯，他是很陽光的男孩，總是問我，姐姐我今天的發型是不是很帥，並且很開朗的樣子，我和弟弟一起生活的很多畫面都是幸福的，他很清楚我喜歡什麼，每次看我，總是給我和孩子帶一些東西，我喜歡他做的飯，我們聊天的感覺，很自由很開心的感覺，看他給我做的飯，我弟弟在我心裏是一個美好的人，我經常叫她清弟，他叫我瑜姐，我們感情很好的。
When I was looking for him today, he came to pick up me and my children. He usually practiced his favorite brush writing at home when he was free. I miss the food he cooked for me. When we were reading and living together, he often cooked for me. He was a very sunny boy and always asked me, "Sister, is my hairstyle very handsome today?" Many pictures of my brother and I living together are happy. He knows what I like very well. Every time he looks at me, he always brings something to me and my children. I like the meal he cooks. The feeling of chatting with us is very free and happy. Seeing the meal he cooks for me, my brother is a beautiful person in my heart. I often call her Qingdi, and he calls me Sister Yu. We have a good relationship.
柯林斯說：你弟弟長的好帥啊，都可以拍電影的那種，看起來真是一個特別棒的男孩子，他給我的感覺也非常的美好，我為你有這樣的弟弟而感到很開心，應該謝謝他當年救了你，不然我就遇不到你了，他真的很了不起。
Collins said: Your brother is so handsome, he can make movies. He looks like a really good boy. He feels very good to me. I am very happy that you have such a brother. , I should thank him for saving you back then, otherwise I will not meet you, he is really amazing.
海倫說：給你看個我們這裏的大自然吧，其實夏季也很美的，我很喜歡的。我單身那時候，我夢想可以周遊世界，但是我現在才走過中國不多的幾個城市和旅遊景點，每次我網絡看到我喜歡的城市和旅遊景點的時候，我都會保存到我的博客裏，那是我未來努力想要去的遠方，世界這麼大，這麼美好，我以後一定會去看看。
Helen said: Let me show you the nature here. In fact, summer is also very beautiful. I like it very much. When I was single, I dreamed of traveling around the world, but now I have walked through a few cities and tourist attractions in China. Every time I see cities and tourist attractions that I like on the Internet, I will save them to my In the blog, that is the far place I will strive to go to in the future. The world is so big and beautiful, I will definitely visit it in the future.
我要好好學習，讓自己提升和擴大自己的眼界以及對世界的認知，因為孩子是透過母親看世界的，所以我要努力做一個美好的人，這對孩子以後的教育很重要，我自己的爸爸媽媽在我從小到大的記憶中不美好，總是抱怨，他們從不讀書學習，帶著暴力爭吵，我小時候就在思考，我以後如果做父母，我要做有智慧有學識看起來很美好優雅的媽媽，並且可以用愛和影響力讓我孩子覺得她願意活成媽媽的樣子。
I want to study hard and let myself improve and expand my horizons and understanding of the world. Because children see the world through their mothers, I have to work hard to be a good person. This is very important for my children’s future education. My parents are not good in my childhood memories. They always complain. They never read or study, and quarrel with violence. I was thinking when I was a child. If I become a parent in the future, I must be wise and knowledgeable. A beautiful and elegant mother,
And can use love and influence to make my child feel that she is willing to live like a mother.
我希望我的孩子在欣賞和鼓勵裏成長的自信陽光，能夠看到自己的潛能和價值，而不是和我小時候一樣被吼叫打罵式的教育，我小時候不是被大人拿來和別人家孩子比較，就是被辱罵不如別人，從而導致我被這種家庭教育折磨的做事緊張慌亂，性格缺陷特別多，我那時候覺得我在自己大人心裏，簡直就是多余的垃圾，仿佛他們世界裏的不如意都是因為我，我的父母家人都說，都是為了你，我才活的很累，你還不好好學習，考了這麼低的成績，太對不起大人，那時候的我是多麼自責和難過。以致於我從小到大遇到困難都自我否定和放棄，差點抑郁自殺死了，所以我要做一個快樂的父母，不會把自己幸福寄托在孩子身上，而是教會孩子如何找到她們存在的價值，我相信一個努力活好的母親，一定是對孩子有好的影響。
I hope that my children can see their own potential and value in the self-confident sunshine that grows in appreciation and encouragement, instead of being yelled and beaten as I was when I was a child. When I was a child, I was not used by adults to compare with other children. , That is, being insulted as inferior to others, which caused me to be nervous and flustered by this kind of family education, and had many personality defects. At that time, I felt that I was just extra rubbish in my adult heart, as if the unsatisfactory things in their world because I, My parents and family members said that it was all because of you that I was very tired. You still didn't study well, and I was too sorry for the adults at that time. I was so sorry and sad at that time. As a result, when I was a child, when I encountered difficulties, I denied and gave up. I was almost depressed and killed myself. Therefore, I will be a happy parent. I will not trust my happiness on my children, but teach my children how to find their existence. Value, I believe that a mother who works hard to live a good life must have a good impact on her children.
我現在的成長都是在療愈曾經的童年的創傷和陰影，每次小時候創傷在我生活中被看到，我內心無比痛苦，我就是這麼一點一點艱難的前行，幸福的人總是用童年治愈一生，而不幸的一生，總是用一生療愈童年的創傷，雖然療愈自己內心的小孩讓自己很痛苦，但是為了我更好的人生，我必須從內而外的讓自己變得更好，我一直和自己這麼說，不過在我面對這一切的時候，我確實變得更好，更懂得愛，懂得珍惜以及美好，我好好好努力，遇見那個更美好的自己，現在的自己已經不怨恨自己的父母，畢竟他們自己都不懂的如何活好自己，怎麼懂得教育我，反而我和自己的過去和解以後，我人生輕松很多。
I now grow up in the healing of the trauma and shadow of childhood, every time the trauma of childhood is seen in my life, my heart is extremely painful, I am so difficult to move forward bit by bit, happy people always use childhood to heal life, and unfortunate life, always use life to heal the trauma of childhood, although healing their inner children. But for my better life, I must make myself better from the inside out, I have always said so to myself, but in the face of all this, I do become better, know more about love, know how to cherish and good, I will work hard to meet that better self, now I do not hate my parents. After all, they do not know how to live their own, how to educate me, but I and their past reconciliation, my life is much easier.
我希望我孩子看到我，不會和我當年看到自己父母那樣，從而覺得自己活在人間地獄裏，從而後悔自己來到這個世上。所以我要好好經營好自己，讓自己盡可能做一個看起來還算不錯的媽媽，等我女兒大點了，我就可以帶她們和家人出去看看世界，現在她們太小了，我就在美好的田園生活中陪伴老人孩子學習成長，我認為我現在的生活也很美好的。
I hope that my children will not see me like I saw their parents back then, and feel that they are living in hell on earth, and regret that they have come into this world. So I have to manage myself well and try my best to be a good-looking mother. When my daughters are older, I can take them and my family out to see the world. Now they are too young and I am here. Accompanying the elderly and children to learn and grow in the beautiful pastoral life, I think my current life is also very good.
柯林斯說：我跟你一樣，也非常熱愛大自然，這也是我為什麼非常喜歡旅行和探索這個世界的原因，以後有機會，我一定會帶你和孩子去看世界很多不同的地方，我的父母雖然離開我，但是他們給予我很多的愛和關懷，他們確實是很好的父母，我很懷念他們，我知道你早年的成長有很多創傷，但是親愛的海倫不要擔心，因為你是非常勇敢的人，你可以坦誠的面對自己的內心和那個不完美的自己，這也就是你為什麼可以變得比過去好的原因，只有你接納過去那個不好的自己，你才可以變得更好，相信我，你現在還有我不是嗎？我會陪你成為那個更好的自己，因為你在我心裏，是那個最棒的海倫！
Collins said: I am like you, and I love nature very much. This is the reason why I like to travel and explore the world so much. I will take you and your children to see many different places in the world when I have the opportunity in the future. My parents Although they left me, they gave me a lot of love and care. They are indeed very good parents. I miss them very much. I know that your early growth has many traumas, but don’t worry, dear Helen, Because you are a very brave person, you can face your heart and that imperfect self frankly. This is why you can become better than the past. Only if you accept the bad self in the past, you can Can be better, trust me, you still have me now, don’t you? I will accompany you to become that better self, because you are the best Helen in my heart!
海倫說：在我心裏，凡一切過往，皆為序章，假如上天給你這樣的一份生活，我便相信一切自有天意，我只需要把自己的日子過好，這就是幸福的捷徑，我一直都是這麼理解我的人生。人生最為快意之事，是我每次大難不死，從地獄爬上來的那一刻，讓意識到自己從苦難中不斷突圍才是我真正活著的意義。
Helen said: In my heart, everything in the past is a prologue. If God gives you such a life, I believe that everything has its own will. I only need to live my life well. This is the shortcut to happiness. I I have always understood my life this way. The most enjoyable thing in life is that every time I survive a catastrophe, the moment I climb up from hell, I realize that I am constantly breaking through from the suffering that is the meaning of my life.
被命運安排這樣活著的我，並不認為人生一路都順是一件好事，這或許在別人眼裏是一種幸運，但是與我而言，一個一路都順利的人，據我觀察，得出一個結論，我身邊每個比我現實處境好的人，各方面都比較順利的人，她們往往感覺生活很無趣。我很多一起讀書的同學都比我人生順利太多了，我覺得她們的人生都是直通車，導致我對自己的人生產生一種錯覺，我仿佛總是被命運甩在最後的哪一個人，從而使我人生的每一步都無比的艱難了，我每次咬牙一個人挺過來的那一刻，我的生命便獲得重生，或許在我生命危難時刻，命運之神會給我安排一個天使守護我，我弟弟就是在我抑郁自殺的時候，守護我的那個天使。只有接近死亡很近的人才會思考活著的意義，我會懂得如何更好的活著，假如我生命沒有經歷這些苦難的陪襯，那麼我人生的幸福也顯得寡淡無味。
Arranged by fate to live like this, I do not think that life is a good thing all the way smoothly, which may be a kind of luck in the eyes of others, but for me, a person who is all the way smoothly, according to my observation, come to a conclusion that everyone around me is better than my real situation, all aspects of the people who are relatively smooth, they often feel that life is very boring. Many of my classmates who studied together had a much smoother life than I did. I felt that their lives were all through trains, which led me to have an illusion about my own life.It seems that I am always the last person left by fate, which makes every step of my life extremely difficult. Every time I grind my teeth and survive alone, my life will be reborn. Perhaps at the critical moment of my life, the God of fate will arrange an angel to guard me. My brother is the angel who guards me when I commit suicide in depression. Only those who are very close to death will think about the meaning of living, I will know how to live better, if my life does not experience the foil of these hardships, then the happiness of my life seems insipid.
而像我這種出生以來就歷經滄桑者，回想小時候的自己在經歷各種苦難折磨的時候，我幻想自己的人生可以如同電視機裏節目頻道，我自己可以掌握遙控器，遇到痛苦的時候能夠按下遙控器的暫停鍵，或者可以換成其他幸福的頻道，就好比我看電視不喜歡看的節目，我可以用遙控器選擇其他的節目或者暫停，但是我發現我錯了，我越是逃避，人生與之而來的痛苦越是無比的強烈，我逃無可逃，避無可避，我只能選擇接納命運安排到我生命中的一切，從而不在抱怨，並與痛苦握手言和，結伴而行，久而久之我走出來一次又一次的痛苦，我從而獲得了面對生命的勇氣，我有時候都會崇拜自己像個英雄，因為我從命運之神安排給我的苦難裏凱旋而歸，獲得了掌握人生幸福的遙控器，那就是我選擇用怎麼樣的心態解讀我的人生。
And people like me who have gone through vicissitudes of life since I was born, when I think back when I was a child, when I experienced all kinds of hardships, I imagined that my life could be like a TV program channel, and I could control the remote control. I can press the pause button on the remote control, or I can change to other happy channels, just like watching TV programs that I don’t like. I can use the remote control to select other programs or pause, but I found that I was wrong.
The more I evade, the more painful life comes from it. There is no escape, and there is no way to avoid it. I can only choose to accept everything that fate has arranged in my life, so as not to complain, and to suffer Shaking hands and making peace, walking in company, over time, I came out of pain again and again, and I gained the courage to face life. Sometimes I worship myself like a hero, because I am from the misery arranged by the God of Destiny. Triumphant return, Obtaining the remote control to master the happiness of life is the mentality I choose to interpret my life.
我無法選擇命運給我怎樣的人生，比如我的出生，在我很小的時候，被父母不公平對待的時候，我認為人生最不公平的事就是我無法選擇自己的出生，我小時候恨透了我是我父母的孩子，而我也發現原生家庭就是我一生無法逃避的宿命。
I can't choose what kind of life fate gives me, such as my birth. When I was very young, I was treated unfairly by my parents. I think the most unfair thing in life is that I can't choose my own birth. When I was a child, I hated that I was the child of my parents, and I also found that the original family was the fate that I could not escape in my life.
我擁有個精神病的母親和一個暴力傾向的父親以及對我有極強控制欲的姨媽，我身邊最親的人簡直是我童年的一場噩夢，我覺得自己從小身處在他們上一輩家庭矛盾中不可自拔，這樣的痛苦持續三十年，家庭矛盾紛爭是導致我抑郁自殺的根本原因，矛盾對立的家庭導致我人格分裂，久而久之導致抑郁高峰期而出現自殺行為。
I have a mentally ill mother, a violent father and an aunt who has a strong desire to control me. The closest person to me is a nightmare of my childhood. I feel that I have been in their previous family since I was a child. I cannot extricate myself from conflicts. This kind of pain lasted for 30 years. Family conflicts and disputes were the root cause of my depression and suicide. The contradictory family led to my personality split, which over time led to suicidal behavior at the peak of depression.
唯獨對我傷害比較少的是我的爺爺奶奶，我小時候有次做夢，夢見上帝和我說，我有什麼心願，我和上帝說，我希望自己的人生我可以自己控制劇情，我可以設定人生的劇本，多年以後的我，我心之所願都在我潛意識吸引下，通過我自己的努力不斷實現，我的人生中出現的一切都是我自己夢想的設定劇本。
The only thing that hurt me less is my grandparents. When I was a child, I had a dream. I dreamed that God told me what I wanted. I told God that I hope that I can control the plot of my life by myself. The script for setting life, many years later, my wish is attracted by my subconscious mind, and it is realized through my own efforts. Everything that appears in my life is the setting script of my own dream.
柯林斯說：我親愛的海倫，我發現你才是生命中真正的強者，你人生成長的軌跡使我內心此刻感到無比的震撼，也讓我無比的心疼這樣一個你，但我相信你會成為那個最好的自己，我希望你找到生命的勇氣，過上你真正想要的人生，因為我心裏的海倫配得上更好的人生，寶貝，你必須更加的努力，然後期待結果，親愛海倫，你告訴我，你從小到大內心的夢想是什麼？
Collins said: My dear Helen, I found that you are the real powerhouse in life. The trajectory of your life’s growth has shocked my heart at this moment, and it also made me feel very sorry for you, but I believe you will become That best self, I hope you find the courage to live and live the life you really want, because the Helen in my heart is worthy of a better life, baby, you must work harder and look forward to the result, dear Helen , Tell me, what is your inner dream since childhood?
海倫說：我小時候遇到太多困難事，我希望自己擁有超能力，我可以預知未來，並且我希望我可以像我看過電視劇裏我特別喜歡的女主那樣，看起來很可愛，滿身才華，並且很善良，和天使一樣擁有光芒，我能夠給遇見我的人帶來溫暖和希望，我喜歡這樣的自己，每次這麼想都會讓我特別開心，所以我仿佛時刻都會進入這種狀態，其實我一直活在自己的內心世界的人，換而言之，我是活在自己想象中的那個人，現實世界對我影響相對而言比較小。
Helen said: I encountered too many difficult things when I was a child, I hope I have super powers, I can predict the future, and I hope that I can look cute and full of body like the heroine I especially like in TV series. Talented, kind, and radiant like an angel, I can bring warmth and hope to people who meet me. I like myself like this. Every time I think about it, it makes me very happy, so I seem to be in this state all the time.
所以我每次看到影視作品裏我喜歡角色，我會把自己幻想成為她們，在我每次遇到困難或者被不公平對待的時候，我會停下來思考，如果我是我喜歡的影視作品裏的角色，我會如何面對自己當下人生，我要做我人生的創作者，也就是我命運的主人，後面我會通過自己的夢境預知我現實裏出現的吉兇，並且每次很準確，我很相信周公解夢裏說的，但是我不喜歡不好夢境，每次夢到，如果我對照周公解夢是不好的夢境，我會做好自己內心的調整，不好的夢境也會被我從新解讀，我從小到大這種直覺很好，並且特別準確，我能夠通過自己直覺找到和我命運與之匹配的人。
So every time I see my favorite characters in movies and TV works, I will fantasize myself as them, and every time I encounter difficulties or are treated unfairly, I will stop and think, if I were the characters in my favorite movies and TV works, how would I face my present life? I want to be the creator of my life, that is, the master of my destiny. Later, I will predict the good or bad luck in my reality through my dream, and every time it is very accurate. I believe what Zhou Gong said in his dream interpretation, but I don't like bad dreams. Every time I dream, if I compare Zhou Gong's dream interpretation with bad dreams, I will adjust my heart well, and bad dreams will be re-interpreted by me. I have a good intuition from childhood to adulthood, and it is particularly accurate. I can use my intuition to find someone who is compatible with my destiny.
柯林斯說：寶貝，我覺得你人生真無比神奇，我想知道你人生現實生活中通過你想象都發生那些事，我現在對你感到無比的好奇？我覺得你人生的故事特別有趣？我很想知道你都經歷了什麼？
Collins said: "Baby, I think your life is really incredible, I want to know your life in real life through your imagination what happened, I am now incredibly curious about you."? I think your life story is very interesting? I'd like to know what you've been through?
海倫說：因為我從小到大最讓我不滿意的就是我的父母，然後我根據自己內心虛擬假設出一個父母，很多年以後，我這個願望夢想成真了，我擁有了一對公婆，他們就是我小時候我內心深處比較滿意的父母，他們出現在我生命中的那一刻，我的直覺告訴我，這就是我要找的父母，小時候爺爺奶奶最疼愛我了，所以我根據爺爺奶奶給我的感覺我假設刻畫著一個理想的父母，結果我多年以後找到婆婆和養我長大的奶奶很相似，婆婆和我如同母女一樣，我們會說很多話，她每天給我做飯，小時候我母親沒對我做的事，我婆婆都在給我做，並且和我小時候想象中的基本差不多，我母親沒對我做的事，我通過婆婆得到了一種彌補。
Helen said: Because I have been dissatisfied with my parents since I was a child, and then I hypothesized a parent based on my heart. After many years, my wish and dream came true. I have a pair of in-laws. They are the parents who were more satisfied in my heart when I was a child. At the moment when they appeared in my life, my instinct told me that this is the parent I was looking for. When I was a child, my grandparents loved me the most, so I gave it according to my grandparents. My feeling I assume that I portray an ideal parent, As a result, I found my mother-in-law and the grandmother who raised me many years later. My mother-in-law and I are like mother and daughter. We talk a lot. She cooks for me every day. What my mother didn’t do to me when I was a child, my mother-in-law did I made it for me, and it was almost the same as I imagined when I was a child. What my mother did not do to me, I got a kind of compensation through my mother-in-law.
而我公公就是和我當年的爺爺很像，並且還是在我爺爺的葬禮上給我爺爺寫祭文的人，我爺爺生前是讀書人，並且也是一個經常給他人寫祭文的人，我基本從小到大聽著爺爺的祭文長大，並且我聽過爺爺給我講很多神話鬼怪故事長大的，我從小熱愛讀書都是受到爺爺的影響，我在看到公公的那一刻，我就知道那就是我要找的人，後面我婚姻就被這樣安排了，公公是我小時候村子裏小學的校長。
Later, my marriage was arranged like this. My father-in-law was the principal of the elementary school in the village when I was young.
在我童年記憶中，公公是唯一一個對我留下深刻印象的人，其他周圍的老師同學都歧視我，唯獨他沒有，我五歲被送去村裏小學上學前班，我特別喜歡學習，於是我爬到教室的窗臺上，偷偷的聽公公給一年級學生讀語文，那時候我公公讀到課文是《春天來了》桃花開了，梨花開了，我在教室的玻璃窗外跟著公公的領讀，嘴裏也讀著，那是我小時候特別開心的記憶，後面下課了，窗臺太高了，我不敢跳下來，公公走出教室把我從窗臺上抱了下來，我當時還以為有人要打我，我下意識的喊著，那個大壞蛋抓我，快點放開我，我回頭一看，是那個教室上課的老師，但是他沒有罵我，對著我笑了一下，而那一刻我覺得他是最好的老師，我放學回家以後，還很開心的把這件事和我奶奶說了。
In my childhood memory, Father is the only one left a deep impression on me, The other teachers around the students all discriminate against me, But he didn't. I was five years old was sent to the village primary school preschool, I especially like to learn, So I climbed to the classroom on the windowsill, Secretly listen to father to grade one students read Chinese. At that time my father read the text is 《 Spring is coming 》 The peach blossom When the pear blossoms blossomed, I followed my father-in-law's lead outside the glass window of the classroom and read it in my mouth, which was a very happy memory of my childhood.After class, the windowsill was too high, I dared not jump down, my father-in-law went out of the classroom and held me down from the windowsill. I thought someone was going to hit me at that time. I subconsciously shouted, "The big bad guy caught me, let me go quickly." I looked back and saw that it was the teacher in the classroom, but he did not scold me. He smiled at me. At that moment, I thought he was the best teacher. When I came home from school, I was very happy to tell my grandmother about it.
我們村子那時候的小學，都是一個班主任把學生從一年級帶到五年級畢業，中間不會換班主任，學習科目只有語文和數學，也是一個班主任帶就可以，除非一個學生考試科目不夠六十分留級，不然是無法換班主任，而我小學五年的生活簡直倒黴透頂，我第一學期總是語文數學考試三四十分無法及格，每次考試下來，都被班主任打用板子打的手心紅腫到痛到握不住拳頭，實在太痛苦。
In the elementary school in our village at that time, a class teacher took the students from grade one to grade five. There was no change of head teacher in the middle. The subjects of study were only Chinese and mathematics, and it was enough for a head teacher, unless a student had less than 60 subjects in the exam. Repeated grades, otherwise it would be impossible to change the head teacher, and my five-year life in elementary school was terribly unlucky. In the first semester, I always failed the Chinese and math exam 30 or 40 minutes. Every time I finished the exam, I was beaten by the head teacher with the palm of the board. The swelling was so painful that I couldn't hold my fist. It was too painful.
我那時候特別羨慕那些得了感冒可以寫請假條不用去學校的學生，但是我總是不會得感冒，我也不敢逃學，我只能每天忍受被老師課堂提問回答不上來，然後被班主任打罵，並且都是當著全班同學老師辱罵我，老師說我是全班最笨的孩子，簡直和我媽一樣是個神經病，如果我能夠學好，豬都可以來學校讀書，然後全班同學都笑我，和班主任一樣的罵我，我每次寫的作業特別整齊，但是我不會做題，經常做錯，我也不敢問老師，以致於我作業本上的題目都是老師畫的錯號，但是我還是很認真的做完每次作業，其他學生也不願意教我正確答案。
At that time, I especially envied those students who had caught a cold and could write a leave note without going to school. But I always didn't catch a cold, and I didn't dare to play truant. I could only endure being questioned and answered by the teacher in class every day. Then I was beaten and scolded by the head teacher, and I was abused by the teacher in front of the whole class. The teacher said that I was the most stupid child in the class. It was like my mother. If I can learn well, pigs can come to school to study, and then the whole class laughed at me, and the head teacher scolded me, every time I write the homework is particularly neat, but I will not do the problem, often wrong, I dare not ask the teacher, so that the title of my homework is the wrong number drawn by the teacher, but I am still very serious. The other students were reluctant to teach me the correct answers.
一起的同學經常會欺負我，一次好幾個同學都會打我，我小時候被好幾個同學圍攻欺負，從而我被推倒墻角，那時候我剛換的新牙齒，被磕的滿口是血，我一個多月都疼的無法吃東西，奶奶每次給我上學帶的饃饃，都會被學校那些厲害的學生搶走吃了，不好吃的也不讓我吃，丟地上踩幾腳也不讓我吃，還威脅我說，如果我告訴家人，就打死我，於是我偷偷把同學踩了的饅頭撿起來帶回家給我們家小狗吃，不敢告訴家人，我的作業本經常被同學撕破，還有我的課本也是，我經常被其他學生作弄，有次我被一個男生打的次數多了，他還搶走了我奶奶給我做的新沙包丟教室房頂上不讓我玩，我那時候特別憤怒，我狠狠打了對方兩巴掌，那時候我七歲，而後那個男孩再也沒敢欺負我。
My classmates would often bully me. Several classmates would beat me at a time. When I was a child, I was mobbed and bullied by several classmates, so I was pushed down the corner. At that time, the new teeth I had just replaced were full of blood. I was more than one. I was so painful that I couldn’t eat every month. Every time my grandma brought me to school, the buns would be snatched away by the school’s powerful students. I would not be allowed to eat anything that was not tasty, nor would I be allowed to step on the ground a few feet. Eat and threaten me that if I tell my family,
I was beaten to death, so I secretly picked up the buns that my classmates stepped on and took them home to our puppies. I didn’t dare to tell my family that my homework books were often torn by classmates, and so did my textbooks. I often I was tricked by other students. One time I was beaten by a boy too many times. He even snatched the new sandbags my grandma made for me and threw them on the roof of the classroom to prevent me from playing. I was very angry at that time and I hit hard. I slapped the other side twice. I was seven years old at that time, and the boy never dared to bully me again.
我母親是精神病患者，我出生以來不知道正常的母親是什麼樣子，她每天在學校的山頭哭著唱著有時候罵人，瘋的太厲害就跑的找不到人了，我小時候記憶裏的母親經常是被綁起來，我經常和母親一起睡，母親經常吵我不能寫作業，我做夢都夢到母親發瘋打我走失了，其他孩子都歧視我，我前面再走，其他孩子背後用石頭丟我，罵我是瘋婆子生的孩子，我就這麼度過了自己的童年，那簡直就是我人生的一場噩夢，我越是討厭我的班主任，他的行為引發其他同學對我的歧視和不停的傷害，我內心好狠我那時候的班主任，越是恨班主任，我內心越是渴望換成我公公做我班主任，當時小學的校長，但是這個願望沒實現，因為每次關鍵一學期，我每次科目剛好六十分，後面小學就這樣被虐待畢業了，我也認命了！
My mother is a mentally ill. Since I was born, I don’t know what a normal mother looks like. She cries and sings on the hills of school every day and sometimes scolds people. If she is too crazy, she can’t find anyone. It’s from my childhood memories. My mother is often tied up. I often sleep with my mother. My mother often quarrels that I can’t do my homework. I dream of my mother going crazy and beating me and I am lost. The other children discriminate against me. I go ahead and other children use stones behind them. Lose me, Calling me a child born by a mad woman, I spent my childhood like this. It was simply a nightmare in my life. The more I hate my head teacher, his behavior triggers discrimination and disapproval of other classmates. Stop hurting, my heart is so cruel to my class teacher at that time. The more I hate the class teacher, the more I desire to be replaced by my father-in-law, who was the principal of the elementary school at the time, but this wish did not come true, because every semester is critical. Every time I got 60 points in my subjects, I was abused and graduated from elementary school later, and I accepted my fate too!
如果事與願違，我便相信命運自有安排，我爺爺在我大學畢業的第二年去世，而出現在我爺爺葬禮上的公公就是我當年小時候很喜歡的老師，爺爺葬禮那天我特別開心，其他親人都特別傷心的哭著，只有我那天特別興奮，我覺得公公就是我死去的爺爺，爺爺並沒有死，只是通過公公出現在我生活中。
If things go against my wishes, I believe that fate has its own arrangements. My grandfather passed away in the second year of my university graduation. The father-in-law who appeared at my grandfather’s funeral was the teacher I liked very much when I was a child. I was very happy on the day of my grandfather’s funeral. They were all very sad and crying. Only I was very excited that day. I think my father-in-law was my dead grandfather. Grandpa was not dead, but appeared in my life through his father-in-law.
後面兩家人在閑聊中，說到各自兒女婚姻大事，經過相親結婚，後面我成為我公公的兒媳婦，在後面的婚姻裏，我和公婆一家人相處很開心，我童年缺失的母愛父愛在公婆身的得到一種彌補，小時候我覺得一家人一起開心吃頓飯對我都是奢望，而我結婚以後，每頓飯一家人可以幸福的一起吃，公婆一家人和我現在的生活，是我小時候和我爺爺奶奶那段生活的延續，我多年以後明白，原來當年公公不是我渴望的班主任，是上帝為了安排他做我的理想設定的父親角色，讓我們成為一家人，彌補我童年對一個普通家庭愛的渴望，我六年婚姻生活確實和公婆一家人過的其樂融融，我性格缺陷在公婆性格影響下得到很好塑造和修正，我從此便相信，念念不忘，生命必有回響。
In the back of the two families chatting, talking about their children's marriage event, after a blind date marriage, I became my father-in-law's daughter-in-law, in the back of the marriage, I and my parents-in-law family get along very happily, my childhood lack of maternal love and paternal love in the parents-in-law body to get a kind of compensation, when I was a child, I felt that the family had a happy meal together. Every meal family can be happy to eat together, parents-in-law family and my life now, is my childhood and my grandparents that life continuation, I understand after many years, the original father-in-law is not my desire for the class teacher, is God in order to arrange him to do my ideal set of father role, let us become a family, make up for my childhood to an ordinary family love. My six years of marriage and parents-in-law family really happy, my character defects in the parents-in-law under the influence of personality has been well shaped and corrected, I have since believed that, never forget, life will have an echo.
還有我希望自己以後的孩子都是女孩，我幻想假如我母親無法給我好的教育，我以後有女兒，我應該培養自己做個好媽媽。如何更好的影響我的女兒，我想看看她會比我變得更好，確實命運讓我生的都是女孩，我不喜歡男孩，因為我從小到大在重男輕女家庭長大，我經常因為弟弟聰明而不被看好，我特別自卑，但是我們這裏人希望生男孩，而我根本不願意，當我意外有一個孩子在我生命壓力很大的時候，我那時候一點不希望自己做媽媽，而後三個月我先兆流產的孩子是男孩，我所預言自己的人生一定會發生在我生活中。
I also hope that my children in the future will be girls. I imagine that if my mother cannot give me a good education, I will have a daughter in the future and I should cultivate myself to be a good mother. How to better influence my daughter, I want to see that she will be better than me. It is true that fate made me give birth to girls. I don’t like boys because I grew up in a patriarchal family. I am often not favored because my younger brother is smart, I am particularly inferior, but we people here want to have a boy, And I don’t want it at all. When I accidentally had a child in my life when I was under great pressure, I didn’t want to be a mother at all at that time. In the next three months, my child with threatened miscarriage was a boy. I predicted that my life would be certain. Will happen in my life.
還有一次，我老公描述一個老人擋著馬路不走，他說現在這種老人碰瓷要錢，我當時聽完，腦子瞬間出現我老公騎著電動車碰到老奶奶，而後老奶奶摔倒後面被送醫院，而這一切隔了一天就在我老公和我婆婆去看病那天，我老公去快遞的時候剛好撞到一個老太太，並且一模一樣的場景，還好沒太大事故，花了點錢醫院檢查沒事就過去了。
On another occasion, my husband described an old man blocking the road and not walking. He said that now this kind of old man touches porcelain and asks for money. After listening to it, my brain instantly appeared that my husband rode an electric bicycle and met his grandmother. Then the grandmother fell down and was sent to the hospital. All this happened one day after my husband and my mother-in-law went to see the doctor. My husband went to express delivery. And the same scene, fortunately not too big accident, spent some money on the hospital to check nothing on the past.
還有一次我老公工地幹活完，在回家路上順便買西瓜準備帶回家路上，突然被一個騎摩托車的少年撞倒，還好我老公沒事，對方被劃破臉，而後我老公把這個人送醫院，事實是那個孩子不懂交通規則騎著摩托車橫穿馬路撞到我老公，自己被反彈到一輛皮卡車以後摔傷的，後面我老公身上沒錢，剛好撞到那個人和我們鄰居村子一個人認識，借了一千塊錢去帶那個孩子進醫院做檢查，他們剛好還是親戚關系，對方借著這事不斷打電話威脅我公婆賠錢，不然起訴我們，那時候婆婆難過的每天都哭。
Another time my husband finished his work on the construction site and bought watermelon on the way home to take it home. Suddenly he was knocked down by a boy riding a motorcycle. Fortunately, my husband was okay, and his face was scratched. This person was taken to the hospital. The fact is that the kid didn’t understand the traffic rules and ran across the road on a motorcycle and hit my husband. He was bounced back into a pickup truck and then fell. My husband had no money behind him and just hit that person. I knew one person from our neighbor village,
Borrowed a thousand yuan to take the child to the hospital for an examination. They happened to be relatives. The other party used this to threaten my in-laws with money, or sued us. At that time, the mother-in-law was sad and crying every day.
隔了兩天，我在家編輯文案工作，對方找我們家上門要錢，態度特別差，讓我馬上還錢，因為我是他老婆，我那時候沒錢，我特別真誠給對方道歉，對方不依不饒對我說，有本事讓你老公不要出車禍，我那時候說，我們自己也不願意發生這樣的事，但是事發生了，我也非常難過，不要擔心我一定會還錢的。
Two days later, I was editing and copywriting work at home. The other party came to our house to ask for money. The attitude was so bad that he asked me to pay it back immediately. Because I was his wife and I had no money at that time, I sincerely apologized to the other party. Bu Rao told me that I have the ability to tell your husband not to have a car accident. At that time, I said that we don't want such a thing to happen, but when it happened, I was very sad. Don't worry that I will definitely pay back.
然後我難過的和對方說，假如這件事發生你身上，你就不會這樣和我說話，你就會明白我因為此事多麼的難過。我希望你們親戚早點好起來，對方還是不依不饒罵我，說我老公借錢不還，後面公婆把錢給了對方以後，他便離開我們家。
Then I said sadly to the other party, if this happened to you, you would not talk to me like this, and you would understand how sad I was because of this. I hope your relatives will get better soon. The other party still refuses to scold me, saying that my husband borrowed the money and didn't pay it back. After the in-laws gave the money to the other party, he left our house.
隔了一個多月，這個對我態度很差，說我老公借錢不還的人，罵我有本事不要讓我老公出車禍的人，有一天去街上帶著自己老婆和媽媽去鎮上趕集，據說那天還是他生日，而後他開車路上出了車禍，母親車禍身亡，這一切都是發生在我生活裏真實的故事。
After more than a month, this person had a very bad attitude towards me, saying that my husband borrowed money and didn't pay it back, and someone who scolded me for having the ability not to let my husband get involved in a car accident. One day he went to the street and took his wife and mother to town. Going to the fair, it is said that it was his birthday that day, and then he was in a car accident while driving, and his mother was killed in a car accident. All these are true stories that happened in my life.
柯林斯說：我在沒遇到你以前，總以為自己的人生是一個人獨自崩潰，又一個人悄悄自愈，沒想到你人生也是和我一樣，有如此多的不幸，但是幸運的是，所求皆所願 ，所行皆坦途，能如願以償何其榮幸，可從不得償所願才是人生，當你明白這一點，並且接納這就是人生的真相以後，人生會發生逆轉，世事不會盡如人意，工作，情感，生活如此，最值得感恩的是，我們明白這一切，依然對生活保持善良和希望，我相信你就是那個墜入人間的天使，而我是如此幸運，這麼可愛善良的你讓我這麼幸運的遇見，我親愛的海倫，我是如此愛你，因為你就是我一直在尋找的那個人。
Collins said: Before I met you, I always thought that my life was a breakdown of one person alone, and another person quietly healed himself. I did not expect that your life is the same as mine, with so many misfortunes, but fortunately, all It’s a great honor to be able to get what you want, but what you want is an honor. When you understand this and accept that this is the truth of life, life will be reversed and things will not be the same Satisfactory, Work, emotions, and life are like this. The most grateful thing is that we understand all this and still maintain kindness and hope for life. I believe you are the angel who fell into the world, and I am so lucky, so cute and kind you let me Such a lucky encounter, my dear Helen, I love you so much, because you are the person I have been looking for.
海倫說：我即使經歷任何不幸，但是我一直在思考，日子反正要過，愁眉苦臉，不如眉開眼笑，一念之差，雲泥之別，我才不與自己作對，我已經命運遭遇夠不幸，而我應該好好善待這樣一個自己，所以我慢慢學會去愛這個充滿困難的我自己，在愛自己的同時，我也學會了愛他人。
Helen said: Even if I experience any misfortunes, I have been thinking about it. Life is about to pass anyway. It is better to open my eyes and smile. I will not be against myself because of the difference in thoughts and the difference between clouds and mud. My destiny has suffered enough misfortune, and I should be well. Be kind to such a self, so I slowly learn to love myself who is full of difficulties. While loving myself, I also learned to love others.
隨著我成長漸漸明白，我不應該不再追求所謂的圓滿，就好像月亮圓著圓著就虧了，我每天接水的水桶太滿了，滿著滿著就溢了，經常弄濕我褲子，所以我不會給桶子接太滿的水，這樣不會因為因為提起來太重而使水灑滿我褲子，凡事七八成圓滿、留二三分缺憾，別人看著也不會不生嫉恨，自身可以永遠保持著一份成長努力鬥誌，人生啊，所有遺憾皆是成全，有所缺失，才是境界，因為那是光照進來的地方，所以即使經歷任何不開心，我依然微笑向暖，陽光燦爛，因為我覺得愛笑的女孩，運氣會很好，好運會尋光芒而來，所以我負責讓自己努力發光，因為我相信，總會有人愛上我的微笑。
As I grow up, I gradually understand that I shouldn’t stop pursuing the so-called perfection, as if the moon is round and round and loses. The bucket that I receive water every day is too full, and it overflows when it’s full, and it often wets me. Trousers, so I will not fill the bucket with too much water, so I won’t spill the water over my trousers because it’s too heavy to lift up. Everything is 70% to 80% perfect, leaving two or three points of regret, and others will not look at it. There is no jealousy, and you can always maintain a growth and hard work spirit. In life, all regrets are fulfilled, and something is missing, which is the realm. Because that is where the light comes in, so even if I experience any unhappiness, I still smile warmly and the sun is shining, because I think a girl who loves to laugh, luck It will be very good, good luck will find light, so I am responsible for making myself shine, because I believe that someone will fall in love with my smile.
柯林斯說：我在微信群看到你頭像的那一刻，被你微笑和眼神深深的吸引和治愈，我覺得你笑起來的樣子如此神奇，並且很迷人，在看到你的那一刻，我的直覺告訴我，你就是我要找的人，於是我添加你做了好友，親愛的海倫，你是墜入我生命中的天使，我愛你！
Collins said: The moment I saw your avatar in the WeChat group, I was deeply attracted and healed by your smile and eyes. I think the way you laugh is so amazing and charming. The moment I saw you, I My instinct told me that you are the person I was looking for, so I added you as a friend, dear Helen, you are the angel who fell into my life, I love you!